25 Golf Truisms That Are 100% Accurate
- A two-foot putt counts the same as a two-foot drive.
- Never wash your ball on the tee of a water hole.
- There is no such thing as a friendly wager.
- The stages of golf are Sudden Collapse, Radical Change, Complete Frustration, Slow Improvement, Brief Mastery, and Sudden Collapse.
- The only sure way to get a par is to leave a four-foot birdie putt two inches short of the hole.
- Don’t play with anyone who would question a 7.
- It’s as easy to lower your handicap as it is to reduce your hat size.
- If you really want to be better at golf, go back and take it up at a much earlier age.
- If your driver is hot, your putter will be ice cold.
- If you can hit your irons, you will top your woods.
- If you are keeping your right elbow tucked in, your head will come up.
- Progress in golf consists of two steps forward and ten miles backward.
- One good shank deserves another.
- It takes 17 holes to really get warmed up.
- No golfer ever swung too slowly.
- No golfer ever played too fast.
- One birdie is a hot streak.
- No matter how badly you are playing, it’s always possible to play worse.
- Whatever you think you’re doing wrong is the one thing you’re doing right.
- Any change works for three holes.
- The odds of hitting a duffed shot increase by the square of the number of people watching.
- Never play your son for money.
- Never try to keep more than 300 separate thoughts in your mind during your swing.
- The less skilled the player, the more likely he is to share his ideas about the golf swing.
- It’s surprisingly easy to hole a 50-foot putt when you lie 10.
Have a good (and relatively clean) golf joke that you’d like to see featured? Email it to chris@swingu.com!
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