Golf Joke Of The Day – April 8

Joke Of The Day

A guy has been struggling with his new passion, golf, for over a year. He couldn’t even hit a green in regulation.

One day, early in the morning, he lands his tee shot on a 220-yard par-3 about 5 feet from the cup. He’s all kinds of excited. He spends 10 minutes with lining up the putt, analyzing it from every angle, and making about 20 practice strokes.

Finally, he’s ready.


He addresses the ball, eyes it a couple of times, and readies himself for his first birdie. Suddenly, he hears a voice from the embankment on the side of the green.

“Hey… pssst,” the voice says. “Hey buddy???”

The golfer looks over the edge of the green and sees a man hiding in the bushes. 

“Hey – do you have any toilet paper?” the man asks.

“No!”, the golfer barks and walks back to his putt.

As he addresses it again, he hears the voice again, “Hey… Buddy!”

The golfer walks over to the man again.

”WHAT?!” the annoyed golfer growled.

“How about a golf towel or some napkins I can borrow?” he asks.

“NO!!!” the golfer yells.

Just as he is ready to strike the putt for his first-ever birdie, in his backstroke, he hears the voice again.

“PLEASE!” the man pleads. “Can you help me?”

The golfer, disgusted, throws his putter in the lake, pitches his ball off the cliff, and storms over to the man in the bushes. He approaches the man with a glowing red face.

“Well, you’ve done it!” he hissed. “You have successfully ruined my first-ever attempt at a birdie. WHAT DO YOU WANT NOW???”

The man, sheepishly says, “I really have to go…. Do you have got 5 singles for a $5 bill?”

(Submitted by reader Steve G.)

Hang On Tight